Attacks do not usually come at you head on. No, that would be easily dealt with. Most people are very subtle when they hurt you. Sometimes they are so subtle and sly, you are not sure if you have been hurt or not. You may know you have been hurt, but you are wondering if it was purposeful or just ignorance. After years of subtle attacks, you become much more aware, but can still be blindsided. Sometimes attacks are not so purposeful, but just selfishness being played out at your expense. Hurts like these can come in all shapes and forms, and they can be very complicated. Most of the time, if family is involved, you forgive easily. You put it behind you quickly knowing that you will have to continue to deal with the family member unlike the stranger who yelled at you while walking in NYC or you can avoid them like a coworker in another cubicle . Sometimes with family hurts, you make excuses for the person hoping, wishing that no one could really be such a mean person. Sometimes, you put on your armor or rubber suit knowing that you are going to have to deal with the family member at some function. And sometimes, you get to a point where you say, "Why the heck am I doing this to myself?" If these people are "loved ones," I can do without that kind of love.
Three babes a dancin'...
4 comments:
I don't need that table now...i've a plateful of humble pie to finish. I wouldn't say that i know EXACTLY what you're talking about, but i do know that every family has that undertow of strife and hurt, and ours takes no exception. And on top of that, it is never dealt with, and on the eventuality that it is addressed, it usually strengthens the currents for years forward. The statement, "Who are my mother and brothers..." is becoming increasingly clearer to me as time moves us through this life. In the past few days, i've been doing alot of thinking about the lightness of some of the things i've said on this venue, and how there is not much light to those words at all. That said, i want to encourage you to not get caught in the undertow, its a killer. In fact, getting in the boat is a great alternative. Here, take my hand.
Hey "Brother"...I so appreciate the encouraging words. Do you realize the three of us...you, Lou, and me...were all baptized on the same day?? Man, I'm ready to run this race unashamedly and finish it with joy!!
I'm thankful and awed when hearts show. You guys are a blessing
As for my thoughts on the subject, to long, I had to post a blog :)
Lou, Thanks for sharing, your words do stir up much!!
Lou, I am sad for the pain you feel. You are loved and so appreciated for your talents, strength, shining light, and so much more!
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