Wednesday, April 03, 2013

Midnight Show

My body has been hurting from exercise class. Maybe it was the two weeks off while on vacation, but the last two weeks back at exercise class has about killed me. Maybe it was the bicycle ride last Saturday that made my legs and butt hurt. Anyway, I have been one sore,  tired puppy.

Last night, I fell into bed at our usual time and fell asleep without any ibuprofen - yay!  About the time Toby and I were both in that deep, restful sleep of those with a good conscience, Ranger the Rat Terrier, started the heaving noise of a dog who is about to throw-up. Both Toby and I came out of our dead sleep slowly. He said, "Lou! The dog!"  And I, like a fool, jumped up to grab the dog who was somewhere in the bedroom floor about to puke. Because it was very dark in the room, I tripped over Max who was laying beside my bed. I then stumbled around looking for Ranger. He is basically white and therefore easier to spot than Max. I reached to grab him, but he moved. I followed hollering, "Turn on the light." I managed to grab Ranger and push him toward the tiled area of our bedroom hoping that he did not puke on the carpet. He hit the tile and then took off - still heaving, but not puking. I reached for the light and flicked it on and then went for Ranger again. It took me a second, but the light did not come on (figuratively and literally).  I had turned on the outside porch light, and Toby had not moved. I cussed. In the dark, I made for Ranger again. This time I shoved him toward the bedroom door and the tile in the kitchen. He stopped short and puked on the carpet at the edge of the room. I was pissed at both the dog and Toby.

Toby did get up when I turned on several lights in order to find the carpet cleaner, a rag, etc. He stumbled around as if he still did not quite know what was happening. Then he feigned surprise that I was pissed at him as well as the dog. He and Ranger went back to bed while I cleaned the puke. When I got back in bed, there was a terrible stench.  "Did you fart! God! Toby, are you tryin' to kill me?!"  Like a sixth grade girl, I pulled the covers up over my head, but then I had a hot-flash and had to throw the covers off - all while in a serious snit. Toby and Ranger were huddled on the far side of the bed - both knew they were in trouble. Then I felt the bed shaking. Toby was laughing. And it was rather funny, except I had a hard time going to sleep again, because I hurt so bad. Pay-backs are gonna be hell. 
You've seen this painting before, but it is finished now.  It is acrylic based with oil paints on top. I have not wanted to work on this painting, which I started months ago. Getting out oils is a pain in the butt (my butt already hurts). Yesterday, I got out the oils and had some time to work on the painting. Feel free to critique - it may need some touch-ups.

13 comments:

Jo Castillo said...

We are both laughing out loud. Luckily we don't have pets or small kids anymore, but the memories linger.....

The painting is great. Nice gesture and composition. I'm with you on oils. I like to paint with them, love pushing paint with a brush, but do not care to clean up after. I'm allergic to the linseed oil and have purchased some walnut oil based ones. I have only used them once because of cleaning up after.

OldAFSarge said...

That my lady is an extremely funny story. Why is it that pets (for cats do it too) always desire to vomit on carpet? When there is perfectly good tile or linoleum right nearby.

I love the painting! There's something about it that sings to me.

Bag Blog said...

Jo, I'm sure you and Gene never had any such experiences :) If you need a dog to liven your life, just let me know.

Bag Blog said...

Chris, Such is my life. Thanks for the comment on the painting. I wish I could take credit for the over all composition and light. It was a fun painting to copy.

Buck said...

Pay-backs are gonna be hell.

Heh. I couldn't help but think there's an upside to bein' single and dog-free while reading this. It's a MINOR upside, to be sure, but I'm not in any danger of pay-backs when I least expect them.

I'm not a critic; I just know what I like and I like the finished work. I think the lady might be looking for her dog. ;-)

Bag Blog said...

Buck, without a dog or a wife, you miss out on lots of craziness. If you like a little craziness.

The woman is contemplating her next move.

Barbara said...

Is there a "like" button? I needed this after the day I had! Great story at your expense :)

Stefan said...

The painting looks fantastic! Probably looks better in real life.

You could call it "La femme sans les chiens" in honor of your vacation "The woman without the (puking) dogs", hee...

Buck said...

Wait. Which is it? "Lots" or "little?" Enquiring Minds™ wanna know. :-)

Six said...

Love the story though I hope you won't hate me for saying I'm glad it was you and not me :)

The painting looks great.

Bag Blog said...

You have to type "like" now and then.

Bag Blog said...

That sounds like an Indian name- "Woman with Puking Dog."

Bag Blog said...

My husband was glad it was me too.